Saturday, 20 November 2010

When my OCD attacks......

As some of you may know, I've been quite under the weather in the last few days. This has meant me being off work and having time on my hands but unable to do what I normally would because I've been leveled.

As someone with a history of OCD I know that time like this can be dangerous.
I've found, over time, that time such as this are when I am most likely to have any lapses in my mental health.
My idle mind does wander, not always to negative places but wander it does.
I always get big feelings of redundancy, insecurity and depression when I'm not physically well, and unfortunately this time was no different.
These feelings can lead me to fall back into my "old ways" and not always make decisions that are conducive to my good mental health. (Believe me, there's been a lot of lists written and checks made over the last few days).
This had lead to a few dark days.

Fortunately for me, I have the tools to deal with this. Thanks to the help of my therapists in the past and the skills I learned in group therapy I can handle my dark days, perhaps more retrospectively than I would choose, and get myself back on track.

Along with those things, the love and support of my family and friends has once again been invaluable and I cannot thank you all enough.

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